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Would a Lawyer Today Dare Send Such a Funny & Profane Letter?

If it’s Sunday, it must be football, right? In keeping with the day, Shaun Usher, the British proprietor of the always-splendid website Letters of Note has reposted on his site’s Facebook page a funny exchange of correspondence that I chuckled over when he first shared it last February. It gave me another good laugh today. Shaun’s placed the 1974 letters under the heading Regarding Your Stupid Complaint. They were between Dale O. Cox, Esquire, a persnickety Cleveland Browns season ticket holder, and the Browns’ team office.

As readers of this blog may recall, from pieces such as How to Enjoy Sports Even When Your Teams Have a History of Failure, and a Personal History essay, I grew up following the ups and (often the) downs of Cleveland sports teams. With my late father and brother, I had the great good fortune to attend the last professional sports championship of a Cleveland team–when in the 1964 NFL title game the Browns upset the Baltimore Colts, 27-0. As the scanned copy of a grade school composition of mine will attest, the season ticket holders we sat near in the upper deck in Section 42 were a colorful bunch, like “Bert, a lover of wine” who “often fixe[d] himself a Diet-Rite and wine cocktail,” and Eddie, who “As soon as the first half ends, breaks out [a] thermos of chili . . . he shares with John, while John splits one of his many bottles of wine with him.” (See bottom of post for the whole piece.)

In the summer of 1977, after I was graduated from Franconia College, I worked as a beer vendor at Cleveland Indians’ baseball games. I enjoyed walking the wide open grandstands of cavernous Municipal Stadium, calling out such pitches as “Beer Here!” and “Get Your Cold Ones!”. My happy run as a vendor ended though when I worked a Cleveland Browns pre-season game, and was appalled to discover that the placid beer-drinking Indians fans I’d come to enjoy serving had morphed into, as I wrote in that personal history essay, “an unruly, inebriated mass. . . I was lucky I didn’t have my rack of beers stolen along with all my earnings.

With these recollection of public drinking and intoxication at Municipal Stadium, you can see why I derive such a good laugh from the correspondence between Mr. Cox and the Browns (headings and signatures abridged):

November 18, 1974

The Cleveland Browns
Cleveland Stadium
Cleveland, OH

Gentlemen:

I am one of your season ticket holders who attends or tries to attend every game. It appears that one of the pastimes of several fans has become the sailing of paper airplanes generally made out of the game program. As you know, there is the risk of serious eye injury and perhaps an ear injury as a result of such airplanes. I am sure that this has been called to your attention and that several of your ushers and policemen witnessed the same.

Please be advised that since you are in a position to control or terminate such action on the part of fans, I will hold you responsible for any injury sustained by any person in my party attending one of your sporting events. It is hoped that this disrespectful and possibly dangerous activity will be terminated.

Very truly yours,

Dale O. Cox

The Browns’ reply, from their General Counsel and cc:d to team owner Art Modell, was written only three days later:

Dear Mr. Cox:

Attached is a letter that we received on November 19, 1974. I feel that you should be aware that some asshole is signing your name to stupid letters. 

Very truly yours, 

CLEVELAND STADIUM CORP. 

James N. Bailey,
General Counsel

cc: Arthur B. Modell

Cleveland Browns letters

In the years following the exchange with Mr. Cox, Art Modell–who died this past September at age 87–would later be tagged with infamy among many Cleveland sports fans for relocating the Browns to Baltimore in 1996. Yet it’s plain to me that at least in 1974 he was still a stand-up guy, or he wouldn’t have condoned his team attorney sending such a funny, profane letter to a customer who was himself a lawyer, and one who included in his letter an implied threat of litigation–“I will hold you responsible for any injury sustained by any person in my party attending one of your sporting events.” Would any caution-ridden lawyer today dare to send such a letter in response? If you have thoughts on this and would like to continue the conversation, please let me know what you think in the comments field below. A final point on Mr. Usher’s Letters of Note presentation for this exchange. He uses a photo in it of a Cleveland stadium, but it is the new Browns stadium, built and opened in 1999, on the site of the old Municipal Stadium, where I attended games as a boy and worked in 1977.

A grade school essay of mine on the fans I sat near at Cleveland Browns’ games.

A Farewell to Wendy Weil, Book Agent & Friend to Many

On Thursday afternoon I attended a lovely memorial, sweet and sad, for a longtime book biz friend, literary agent Wendy Weil. I’d learned of her passing on September 29 when, scanning the Saturday NY Times, my gaze had landed on her picture in a death notice. Struck with a sudden heart attack, she’d died one week earlier, on September 22, which happened to have been my birthday. I’d have been shocked and saddened regardless, but knowing she’d died on a day I was celebrating hit me especially. I was reminded me of the psalm-like phrase, “In the midst of life we are in death,” from The Book of Common Prayer. That day I blogged about Wendy at this post, “Wendy Weill, Book Agent Extraordiniare, RIP“, and made sure I cleared time to attend her memorial.

Attesting to personal qualities that engendered much affection and loyalty, and her sound professional judgment, nine author clients of Wendy’s eulogized her, and many more of her writers were in attendance. Authors speaking were Jim Magnuson; Beth Gutcheon; Phillip Lopate; Andrea Barrett; Nancy Salz; Alice Walker (by video); Anthony Doerr; and Karen Joy Fowler. Her playmate from toddlerhood, fellow book agent Lois Wallace, also spoke from her perspective of more than sixty years of shared friendship. A good short film was shown, made by Jessica Wallace, with Wendy speaking about women who keep, or don’t, their own family name upon marrying. Representing Wendy’s immediate family was her stepson, JT Ross, who allowed as he had probably been closer to Wendy than his own mother. At the very end, New Yorker editor Fran Kiernan read a eulogy from novelist Mark Helprin, who’d planned to be there but was prevented from getting to NYC by travel problems.

It was a personal disappointment to me that Helprin wasn’t there, as I had hoped to say hello to him and share memories of Wendy. In the early 1980s, my whole family and our Cleveland bookstore Undercover Books hosted Mark for very successful signings of two of his early books–A Dove of the East and Winter’s Tale. The second of those two events came in 1983, and was a proper launch party, with local book press and probably 150-200 customers. Critic Benjamin DeMott had only a few days earlier praised the novel expansively on the cover or the NY Times Book Review, and people came in droves. We kept pushing the book for weeks, and all Mark’s titles, especially Refiner’s Fire. Wendy heard of our store, and got a hold of me and asked to meet at an ABA, our annual book convention. I was delighted then when I met such a winsome, ebullient emissary from the New York publishing scene. When I left the bookstore in 1985 and moved to NYC to work in publishing, Wendy was excited for me. She was unfailingly helpful and full of encouragement and suggestions as I sought and then landed my first editorial jobs. Later, I always relished receiving submissions from her office–especially after she established her eponymous agency, in ’86–as I knew how carefully she chose her clients and the books they would embark upon writing.

The last time I saw Wendy she began our conversation by recalling our shared connection with Helprin. She excitedly told me she’d recently licensed a new novel of his, to Houghton Mifflin Harcourt. After I learned of Wendy’s passing, I realized that that novel, In Sunlight and In Shadow, was on the verge of officially being published, but she wouldn’t be around for the happy milestone.

Inside the printed memorial program, the front of which is pictured at the top of this post, people who’d like to make contributions in Wendy’s memory were asked to donate to the Women’s Media Group Scholarship Fund and/or the Teachers and Writers Collaborative, a worthy group that Phillip Lopate spoke of in his eulogy. I also found a flyer in the church vestibule promoting an effort to name a memorial bench in Riverside Park in Wendy’s honor, where she was fond of walking her cairn terrier, Bridie (shown on the program cover in Wendy’s arms).

I’ll close with a mention of Andrea Barrett’s moving eulogy. Andrea, who often incorporates elements of natural history into her work, had brought with her a book that Wendy once bought her as a gift, a sort of field guide to mosses. Andrea held it aloft from her place at the lectern, extracting from it  samples of old mosses in tiny envelopes that previous owners of the book had pressed between its pages. Andrea read the tiny pencil-written notations that indicated where the specimens had been found and picked, and when. These were all from the 1930s, and lent a simple kind of homely poetry to the memorial. This example of Wendy’s thoughtfulness showed how much she cherished living things, from the plant or animal worlds, and from the realm of letters and the imagination. She was a dear friend, and will be missed so very much by so very many.

Who Knew? Paved Roads Were the Result of Lobbying by Bicyclists

This tweet by prolific travel essayist Taras Grescoe caught my eye.

I followed the link to a website for what turns out to be a forthcoming book titled Roads Were Not Built for Cars, by Carlton Reid. At the site I found an interior spread with a cover and author info.

I had not really thought about it much before, but what I’ve read here reveals the author’s revisionist thesis that while Henry Ford and his ilk were eager to claim credit for the advent of paved roads in the 1920s, there had actually been a “Good Roads” movement harking as far back as the 1880s, when bicyclists began advocating for better riding surfaces. The writing and publication of the book has evidently been sponsored by bicycle makers in the UK and North America; with this underwriting it’s going to be a free, no-charge ebook download. I find what I’ve read in the spreads at the website reveals a fascinating, heretofore hidden aspect of modern transportation history–the development of decent roads not only made travel more enjoyable for individuals in all kinds of wheeled vehicles, it also enabled farmers and tradespeople to bring their goods to more readily bring their goods to market, spurring economic growth. If you’re interested in reading more on this topic I urge you to go to the book’s website and leave your email address so you can be notified when the book is ready.

Now that I think more about this, I’m reminded of a historical point raised in Alex Shoumatoff’s superb book, The Mountain of Names–a history of kinship that I had a chance to republish in paperback in 1995–which reported that the appearance of the bicycle in rural villages of Europe in the 19th century overnight extended the “courtship range” of male suitors  to a great many more miles than had ever previously been the case. I’ve previously blogged about Shoumatoff’s book in relation to the Mormons’ practice of posthumous baptism, which the late Christopher Hitchens tartly dubbed “a crass attempt at mass identity theft from the deceased.”

A Supportive Message to the President, from a Non-Obama Voter

At President Obama’s post-election press conference today he delivered some opening remarks on the recovering economy and what he believes we should to do ramp up the pace of economic improvement. At the end of this statement, before opening the floor to questions, he read from an email sent to him at the White House after the election had been been decided last week. The writer was Steve Wise of Brentwood, TN, and the entire letter’s been posted on whitehouse.gov. As I invite you to read below, Mr. Wise did not vote for the president. However, he is supportive of him now that it’s clear he’ll be serving another term. What’s most notable is that his message is well-meant, not at all vituperative. He’s what Congressional Republicans are not. I can see why President Obama picked this message to read today, out of what I’m sure were the many thousands sent to the White House last week.

Thank you for your email, Mr. Wise, and your good heart. H/T @jearnest44 whose post of this on Twitter, retweeted by @Froomkin, was the first time I saw it.

Mitt Affirms His 47% Remarks in Pathetic 1st Stab at a Campaign Post-Mortem

I’ve been blogging less about politics since the campaign ended last Tuesday, but am still keeping my eye on the news. An item crossed my path tonight that must be shared: Mitt’s first public post-mortem since his concession speech. As reported in the NY Times this evening, Romney and his campaign finance staff held a conference call with donors today. According to quoted portions, Romney attributed his defeat to President Obama having effectively won votes of lower-income voters by awarding them with “gifts.” The loser made, basically, the same argument as those gross super-pac ads being shown until last Tuesday, where an inner-city African-American woman talks excitedly about the “Obama phone” she’d supposedly been given by the federal government. His excuse for losing–to an audience of people whom he has an interest in convincing he didn’t piss their money away– was very similar to what he told donors in the 47% fundraising pitch. Interesting that he was speaking to contributors both times. The quotes are really offensive. Here are a couple chunks of it, from Ashley Parker’s story in the Times:

In a conference call on Wednesday afternoon with his national finance committee, Mr. Romney said that the president had followed the “old playbook” of wooing specific interest groups — “especially the African-American community, the Hispanic community and young people,” Mr. Romney explained — with targeted gifts and initiatives.
“In each case they were very generous in what they gave to those groups,” Mr. Romney said.
“With regards to the young people, for instance, a forgiveness of college loan interest, was a big gift,” he said. “Free contraceptives were very big with young college-aged women. And then, finally, Obamacare also made a difference for them, because as you know, anybody now 26 years of age and younger was now going to be part of their parents’ plan, and that was a big gift to young people. They turned out in large numbers, a larger share in this election even than in 2008.”
The president’s health care plan, he added, was also a useful tool in mobilizing African American and Hispanic voters. Though Mr. Romney won the white vote with 59 percent, according to exit polls, minorities coalesced around the president in overwhelming numbers — 93 percent of blacks and 71 percent of Hispanics voted to re-elect Mr. Obama.
“You can imagine for somebody making $25,000 or $30,000 or $35,000 a year, being told you’re now going to get free health care, particularly if you don’t have it, getting free health care worth, what, $10,000 per family, in perpetuity, I mean, this is huge,” he said. “Likewise with Hispanic voters, free healthcare was a big plus. But in addition with regards to Hispanic voters, the amnesty for children of illegals, the so-called Dream Act kids, was a huge plus for that voting group.”

On the tactical failures of his campaign,

“I’m very sorry that we didn’t win,” he said on the call. “I know that you expected to win, we expected to win, we were disappointed with the result, we hadn’t anticipated it, and it was very close but close doesn’t count in this business.”
He continued: “And so now we’re looking and saying, ‘O.K., what can we do going forward?’ But frankly we’re still so troubled by the past, it’s hard to put together our plans from the future.” . . .Still, Mr. Romney, ever the data-driven former consultant, offered a brief post-mortem analysis of where he and his campaign had fallen short. Last Wednesday and Thursday, he had convened informal what-went-wrong sessions in his Boston headquarters, where he and a small team of senior advisors pored over the numbers with Mr. Newhouse. And on the call, Mr. Romney also echoed a theme from the campaign trail, saying that while the Mr. Obama “made a big effort on small thing,” his message had been about ‘big issues.’
“Our campaign, in contrast, was talking about big issues for the whole country —military strategy, foreign policy, a strong economy, creating jobs and so forth,” he said. “And by the way, as you’ll hear from Neil, our strategy worked well with many people, but for those who were given a specific gift, if you will, our strategy did not work terribly well.”

You’ll note Romney indulges in the “shellshock” meme to describe his reaction to losing, with a weak claim that he, like the donors, had also believed their own polls and persuasion apparatus. He avers that like them he’s still getting over it all. On TPM there’s been a vigorous debate about whether it’s plausible that the Romney-Ryan camp was really shocked to lose last week, and is supposedly still getting over it. I have a few questions in this area: ) Could they have been so naive as to believe their own hype? 2) Should we call them true believers enclosed in a bubble they’ve stopped noticing even surrounds them? 3) Or cagey pols who want to move on from this without a taint on their reputations, having through political and moral malpractice actually misspent so many hundreds of millions? I agree with Josh Marshall that Romney and his staff would rather be associated with the former than the latter.

Not only does Mitt’s portrayal of President Obama as Gift-Bestower-in-Chief show a consistent worldview–from the 47% remarks to today–show that he really believes a majority of American voters expect ‘stuff’ from the government. Worse, though, he also degrades the ‘stuff’ given them, like they were all baubles. Healthcare, college tuition, and legal status for immigrants–these are hardly luxuries. What a selfish man, for one who has so much to believe that taxpayers and the government should be miserly with people who have so much less.

Manitoba Music Showcase at Arlene’s Grocery/Part II

As mentioned in my last post, ManitobaMusic.com held its annual showcase in Manhattan last night, at Arlene’s Grocery on the lower east side. It was a great night of live music, with four talented acts taking the stage–The Magnificent Sevens, JP Hoe, Chic Gamine, and Greg MacPherson–and a good crowd in the comfortable venue. Happy to share some photos I took during the showcase. Please click here to see all photos.

Manitoba Music Showcase at NYC’s Arlene’s Grocery, Nov. 13

Tuesday night from 8-10:30 PM Arlene’s Grocery on the Lower East Side will feature a great bill with musical acts visiting NYC from the Canadian province of Manitoba. It’ll be the second year in a row that ManitobaMusic.com is hosting this showcase. Last year I had the good fortune to discover two of the acts who are returning tomorrow night, along with two new acts I’m eager to hear for the first time.

The two acts making return visits are Chic Gamine (pictured above) a five piece outfit composed of four female singer/instrumentalists from Winnipeg, and the lone guy, the drummer, from Montreal. With great verve and stage presence, they perform an energetic melange of anglophone, francophone, and First-Nation tinged rootsy pop. Songs like “Closer,” on video here from their website show their tremendous talent and inspired songwriting.

I love their sound, their style, their great look, and am eager to hear them and meet them once more, and their outgoing manager Jeff Horowitz, who made sure I knew about this gig.

The other artist I’m eager to hear again is singer/songwriter JP Hoe (pictured below) also from Winnipeg. A year ago he gave me a demo of his forthcoming album, “Mannequin,” with terrific songs such as “Bingo Palace” and Do I Know You?, and I’m glad to see it’s since been released and he’s been touring North America in support of it, including dates in Los Angeles, Portland, OR, and NYC, as well all over Canada.

Their are two other acts tomorrow night, The Magnificent 7s and Greg MacPherson. I’m eager to hear them too, since ManitobaMusic.com has shown themselves to be so adept at presenting great talent to New Yorkers. If you’re eager to hear some great music, I suggest you come out to Arlene’s Grocery on Stanton St. to hear these talented musicians from Manitoba. The cover is just $5. Here’s the line-up: