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Benjamin Wheeler, “Nearly Always at Full Tilt”

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Readers of this blog may have noted my recent post, Benjamin Wheeler, September 12, 2006-December 15, 2012–RIP, about one of the children murdered last Friday in Newtown, CT, and his father, David Cole Wheeler, with whom I was a co-worker at Avalon Publishing Group from 2001-2006. When I put up that post on Saturday there was no picture yet online of young Benjamin, but I see tonight that the Wheeler family has now released a photograph of their handsome young boy, and I am sharing it here.

A full obituary has now run in the Newtown Bee:

Benjamin Andrew Wheeler

Benjamin Andrew Wheeler was born in Manhattan, September 12, 2006, and moved to Newtown in April 2007 with his parents, Francine and David Wheeler, and his now 9-year-old brother, Nate.

Ben died December 14.

Inspired by dear friends who had made the move some years before, the family found a house in Sandy Hook and a cultural, spiritual, and creative home in the rare collection of priorities and spirit that is Newtown. Since then, Francine has become a fixture in Newtown as a music educator and performer, and more broadly, as a founding member of the children’s music group, The Dream Jam Band, while David works as an illustrator and designer. Both of them are members of Newtown’s own Flagpole Radio Cafe live radio show.

Ben was an irrepressibly bright and spirited boy whose love of fun and excitement at the wonders of life and the world could rarely be contained. His rush to experience life was headlong, creative, and immediate.

He was a devoted fan of his older brother, Nate, and the two of them together filled the house with the noise of four children. He loved the local soccer program, often running across the field long after it was actually necessary, but always smiling and laughing as he moved the ball, nearly always at full tilt. He was becoming a strong swimmer and loved his lessons.

Eager to learn, he could not wait to get to school to see his teacher and his growing group of new first grade friends. Ben was also a member of Tiger Scout Den 6, which met at the Sandy Hook Volunteer Firehouse.

Earlier in December, Ben performed at his piano recital, and sitting still long enough to play one piece was an accomplishment he reveled in. He loved The Beatles, lighthouses, and the number 7 train to Sunnyside, Queens.

In a conversation with Francine before school on Friday, he said, “I still want to be an architect, but I also want to be a paleontologist, because that’s what Nate is going to be and I want to do everything Nate does.”

He will be sadly missed by his loving parents; his brother Nate; his grandparents Carmen and Annette Lobis of Garnet Valley, Penn., Ellsworth and Kay Wheeler of Charleston, S.C., and Harry Berquist of Newport News, Va.; great-grandmother Sophia Turchi of Broomall, Penn.; aunts and uncles Michael and Sheila Lobis, Anthony and Colleen Lobis, and Steven and Ann Lobis, all of Penn., Jeffrey and Dawn Wheeler of Wash., and Andrew and Jamie Wheeler of Hawaii; great-aunts and uncles James and Nancy Cole of Va., Robert Lobis of Colo., and Michael Lobis, Marianne Stewart, and Marie Turchi, all of Penn.; and numerous cousins and friends. He was predeceased by grandmother Ann Cole Berquist.

It is suggested that memorial donations be made to the Benjamin Wheeler Fund, c/o Trinity Episcopal Church, 36 Main Street, Newtown CT 06470.

The family will receive visitors at the Trinity Episcopal Church, Newtown, Wednesday, December 19, from 4 to 8 pm. The funeral will be held at the church Thursday, December 20, at 11 am. Burial will be private.
The B.C. Bailey Funeral Home of Wallingford has been entrusted with the arrangements. To leave a message of remembrance, please visit www.BCBailey.com.

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My deepest condolences to David, Ben’s mother Francine, and their older son, Nate. Please feel free to leave a comment in space below, if you worked at Avalon with us, or would just like to say something.

 

 

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Tweeting a Colleague’s Sad Loss in Newtown

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Benjamin Wheeler, September 12, 2006-December 14, 2012–RIP

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My sadness and anger over the shootings at the elementary school in Connecticut grew this afternoon when I learned that the 6-year old son of a former colleague was among the children killed in the incident. From 2000 through 2006 I worked at Carroll & Graf Publishers, part of the Avalon Publishing Group, and during that time David Cole Wheeler worked in Avalon’s art department as a designer of covers and book interiors. For much of that time, his work station was directly across from my office, and Cole–as he was then known–and I spoke often, about books, design, politics, and New York City. He was a close work friend. Occasionally, I remember seeing his wife Francine come by the office.

On September 11, 2001, Avalon’s office was in lower Manhattan only a couple blocks from the World Trade Center. Many Avalon colleagues experienced that day together–I ran from the building with a co-worker–and months of upset and distress followed, as we continued working in that stricken neighborhood. In 2002, the company moved uptown to Chelsea but all of us having been through so much together, Avalon remained a pretty tight workplace, with a lot of close work friendships. We went our separate ways when Avalon was sold to Perseus Books in 2007, but folks have tended to keep in touch. Earlier this year, several of us came together on Facebook after learning of the sudden death of our office manager, David Ortiz, who was killed in an accident in San Diego where he had moved with his wife. I really liked David, and sadly, had written a recommendation for him on LinkedIn shortly before his death. How unsettling it is to know that that is still there on line.

I’d heard that after Avalon broke up, Cole–who’d begun using his proper first name, David–and Francine had moved out of the city and moved to Connecticut. Tonight, I got a message from longtime friend and Avalon colleague, Keith Wallman. The Wheelers’ six-year old son Benjamin was among those murdered in Newtown. This sketch of Benjamin is in the Washington Post tonight:

Benjamin Wheeler
Benjamin Wheeler, 6, was “a very spirited boy,” said Rabbi Shaul Praver of Adath Israel in Newtown.  He and his parents, David and Francine Wheeler, were not members of the synagogue, but they attended its Hanukkah  celebration.
“There’s always some brave individual who goes up to the dance floor to get everybody involved. That was Ben Wheeler,” he said. “Just delightful people.”
The Wheelers did not want to talk to the media Saturday, said a man who answered the phone at their home. The Episcopal bishops of Connecticut said the family were members of Trinity Episcopal Church of Newton. A volunteer there said the church lost several congregants in the shooting and the rector, the Rev. Kathie Adams-Shepherd, was ministering to them Saturday.

My deepest sympathy and condolences to David and Francine, and their older son, Nate. I’ve been thinking of them all night. They will remain in my heart.

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